I’m Allie and I was born prematurely, causing multiple complications including a severe abdominal infection, meaning I had to have a bowel resection when I was only 12 weeks old. This left me with a scar that stretches across my stomach from my belly button.
When I was a young child, my school life wasn’t particularly impacted by my visible difference, as most of my friends and family were aware of my story and accepted me for who I was. However, secondary school changed that completely.
Bullies became a constant and changing rooms were my worst fear. Comments were made that sought to minimise my presence and discriminate against me. Ultimately, they made me feel worthless and ugly.
Counselling allowed me to sort through my feelings and establish ways to cope and process all the overwhelming thoughts that often consumed my brain.
That’s when I became more aware of how society viewed me generally. Summertime and going on holidays were particularly difficult, as the stares of both children and parents began to become more obvious and harder to ignore.
Comments asking me to cover my stomach up were the final straw. For a long while, I refused to wear bikinis or anything that showed my stomach out of fear of what people might say.
Social media also became an increasingly heavy influence on me. All I saw were posts portraying body image in an entirely unrealistic and unattainable way. This made me feel like I didn’t belong on social media, and that I was “unworthy” of posting pictures of myself on there.
Allie has learnt to love her scar
When I was a young teenager, I was referred to Changing Faces by my dentist after expressing how self-conscious I felt about my severe cross bite. From here, I started counselling sessions, and I finally became more open about how my abdominal scarring made me feel too.
Counselling allowed me to sort through my feelings and establish ways to cope and process all the overwhelming thoughts that often consumed my brain. It gave me a place to feel safe and listened to and the parameters to express myself as a person.
I also got involved with some activity workshops that were run by Changing Faces. These enabled me to interact with other young people who had similar experiences to mine.
My eyes were opened to a whole new world where people could see me for who I was. It was amazing to know that there were people out there who would listen to my story and who had been through a similar time. I found it comforting knowing that I wasn’t alone and that others could relate to my feelings.
Telling my story gave me hope that future generations won’t have to go through the bullying that I faced.
Changing Faces’ counselling and workshops helped me to grow my confidence, enough so that I became a spokesperson for the charity. As part of this role, I was given the opportunity to express my feelings through writing and public speaking. Soon I discovered the power of my voice.
When I turned 18, the natural progression was to become an official campaigner. I wanted to carry on speaking about my experiences and to reach a wider audience, so continuing my campaigning journey was a no-brainer. Telling my story gave me hope that future generations won’t have to go through the bullying that I faced and won’t feel the need to hide themselves from society.
Being a campaigner has enabled me to further strengthen my connections to people within the visible difference community. I’m so grateful that my work with Changing Faces provides me with the chance to project my views in an impactful way, influencing society for the better.
Today, although I still get stared at, I’m happy in my own skin and proud of my scars and the journey they represent. I hope that others can accept themselves and their differences too.
