Feeling angry

It can be hard to live with a disfigurement in a society that seems to place such an unhealthy emphasis on appearance and imposes such a narrow definition of “beauty”. You might feel angry that you have to live with your disfigurement, whilst others seem to have a much easier life. You might also feel angry that you are exposed to other people’s curiosity, and sometimes their ignorance or abuse, which can feel invasive.

Anger is a strong emotion that, whilst very valid, can become destructive and counterproductive if not understood. It can also sometimes feel easier to express anger than to show the pain or hurt that underlies it. Try to ascertain what makes you angry, and what function this emotion has for you. Understanding more about other people’s reactions might also help you to manage them more effectively. Most people don’t mean to cause offence or be insensitive. Of course, abuse and discrimination are unacceptable, and talking to someone about these experiences can help you process your emotions.

Learning to be more assertive about your rights, feelings and needs can also be a good way of expressing difficult and angry feelings before they become unmanageable.